Falling Short Today

My three girls are athletic girlies.

They are competitive. When I say competitive, I mean competitive for real. (And let’s be real, they get it honest.)

Maybe sports is your girls thing and maybe it’s not. Either way is all good because the lessons can transcend different human experiences.

So stay with me…

Growing up, they tried what seemed like all of the sports like softball, basketball, soccer, track, cross-country, tennis, dance, you name it. One of the sports they’ve loved over the past several years is volleyball. I’ve loved watching them develop a love for the game. I hope their love for it continues, even through the natural ups and downs, ebb and flow of sport, and the adversity from all angles that comes from it. I know that sports are not for the faint of heart and it chips away at parts of you, yet builds you up, too…. until you know who you’re firmly rooted in. What a gift it is to watch this revelation unfold for my girls over the years…

As a former athlete, I played at nearly the highest level of sport one can play. This experience, I can tell now, has made me different. Different as a principal, as a mom, and definitely as a mom of daughters who play sports. I appreciate the mommas that I can relate to when it comes to having this lens navigating this world of sport in the world today. Sports today is different, y’all.

All three of our girls have played in national championship games, on the biggest stages and under the brightest lights. They’ve won. They’ve lost. They’re meeting friends all over the country. They’ve been blessed to have a lot of success so far in their lives on the volleyball court y’all- bringing over 10 banners to hang on the wall, tons of gold balls at their gym and all-american accolades for their ages, etc. It’s all such a blessing and we definitely keep it all in perspective, especially as young girls :). More than anything, they have so much fun playing. They love playing. They’ve been heartbroken while falling short and pure excitement when reaching the ‘mountaintop’. (Just for the record, volleyball is one part of their lives-not their whole lives. We’re just currently in a busy season of volleyball and sitting in what a season brings…)

Yet, behind the success and the falling short is where they’re continuing to learn the real lessons. They’ve experienced coaches who have known them as people and as athletes, encouraging them every step of the way. They’ve experienced coaches who treated them like crap (pardon my language) and far below their value as people and as athletes. They’ve learned from the adults who were one way, and after time, something completely different. They’ve learned about others and about themselves. They’ve learned valuable lessons when surrounded by people who believe in them and when people don’t believe in them. They’ve learned about people-the good side and the ugly side. They’ve seen it unfold firsthand.

Your real people can be hard to find sometimes, but are worth finding. They’re learning that, too.

People are messy. We’ve been messy for a long time. It began in Genesis. In my opinion, sport could be the one place where human messiness doesn’t have to be infected-sport in its truest form-but that’s impossible, and I can’t express to you how much I hate that part of sport. Either way, sport helps build the picture of humanity for my girls and your girls too. Helps allow our girls to walk through their own ‘fires’ if you will, through the ‘safe’ lane of sport. For this, I’m thankful. It’s not always easy, but man is it a beautiful ride with them.

As much as I’d prefer I go through any adversity in place of my girls, I am so grateful to be sitting front row as they each navigate walking through their own ‘fire’ as the Lord equips them for their own journeys ahead. A good friend of mine reminded me recently that I can’t be the one to get in the way of what the Lord is burning within them, nor the fires our children will walk through, and we all must walk our paths with Him. I was quickly humbled with this reminder.

Part of the reason I’m writing today, heck writing any of this at all on this blog, is for my girls and your girls to be reminded of who they are, whose they are and where they come from. I want my girls to remember today, because man it was beautiful. I also want to remember today to recognize their growth and the journey they are each on.

Today, my girls fell short-they ended the day with losses on the court. The beautiful part of losing, coming from someone who hates to lose, is that these are some of the most beautiful moments that can have more impact than anything. Sitting with my girls after a loss has changed over time. It’s amazing how much perspective, maturity and wisdom the Lord has permeated into my girls. Over the years He continues to build the Truth within them that no matter the wins, the losses, the trophies, the whatever you can fill the blank in with, this whole world of sport is simply building them and equipping them for the real game He is preparing for them-life now and life in eternity.

Their focus is changing. Their mindset is changing. Their growth is beautiful, and I can’t put my finger on what the Lord is doing, but it’s something only He can. We’ve been sitting in this beautiful season of change in ways that can’t be seen my the human eye but something beautiful He’s unfolding in each of our girls, and I’m grateful He’s our Rock in it all. Truthfully, we know the Lord will sometimes take folks on wild rides, so I’m a bit curious how it all unfolds over time, but thankful to be on this ride with Him. He’s our foundation and I’m thankful He continues to be who He says He is. The foundation is still being built and seeing His promises unfold in front of my eyes is nothing short of amazing-including something as silly as the falling short of a game or the messy side of sport.

Here’s what I reminded my girls this afternoon and what you can also remind your girls of if they also fall short of something they’re pouring their all into:

These moments, with all that sports brings, always reminds us to respect the process.

Respect the game.

Especailly when you give everything you have and still fall short…Which has happened to every great to play the game.

Embrace the suck. Sit there for a moment to feel it all. Then get up. Learn from it. Mature. Choose growth.

Keep going.

Be thankful in these moments, too. Be thankful to have made it to the stage you all have. Be thankful to have played under the biggest lights and the biggest stages. Be thankful for the losses. Be thankful for growing in humility. Be thankful for where you started. Where you currently are on the journey. Be thankful for the gift to be able to move and have a healthy body. What a gift. Be thankful for the girls you now call friends doing the work with you. Be thankful for those you once knew as true friends, but turned out to be something different. There are lessons in those relationships, too. Be thankful for your sisters, your encouragers. Your accountability. The ones who will be there in the end. Be thankful for your parents-the trips, the gas, the early mornings, the car rides. Teaching you and loving you all on the process. The love. The ‘always be there for you’ kinda support. Be thankful for the ability to work and be part of something bigger than yourself. Be thankful for the Spirit within you that has set you apart. Most folks are too scared to step out because of fear. Fear of losing. Fear of failing.

There’s beauty in that too. Be thankful for the drive home in a city that’s beautiful and remember the sounds, the views and the feel of those moments where your family and the Lord are still right there, closer than ever, when something doesn’t pan out how you had maybe worked or hoped for.

And most importantly.

Remember this.

Even if the Lord were to never give us another single gift or do another single thing for us, He’s already given us absolutely everything and more we could ever need-His Son at the cross.

So you might have ended with some L’s today, but thank God you all three have the biggest W and that’s being a daughter of the King.

We have conversations all of the time in our house-about sports, people, the Lord, life, all of it. But today, I was prompted to write it down to remember. Perhaps it’s so one day they can look back and be reminded. Be reminded of who they are and what they’re already overcome. Be reminded to get up and keep going. Be reminded that they’ve already won because of what Jesus has done. Look back and be reminded of how far they’ve come a few years from now as they smile about middle and high school volleyball :)

Yet… as I’m writing I think I’m the one who’s actually being reminded that through it all, He has them covered and in the palm of His hands. I’m reminded that He loves my children even more than I can (which seems unimaginable). I’m reminded His plan for my girls and your girls too is much greater than we could ever imagine. I’m reminded that if this is how I feel watching my children navigate life, I can’t imagine how He feels watching me.

I’m reminded that falling short or sitting in the moments of hurt, loss, defeat, heartbreak are some of the most beautiful moments with Him, and as a momma, are some of the most beautiful moments there are with my girls.

What a blessing it is to serve a God that is near all of the time, but especially when we fall short.